PhD thesis: How to mess shit up. #8- Cleaning screws with formic acid.

Don’t ever clean screws with Formic acid, because they are made of brass and they can rust.

PhD thesis: How to mess shit up. #7- Damaging o-ring

When red o-ring is damaged, you can cause the instrument to crash vent. When the turbo speed is unable to attain a certain speed by a timed period.

He blamed the o-ring being worn out.

I genuinely believe they can last for more than a year, and longer. It should not wear out within a year.

Lessons from Dr Eugene.

Tired of him having to be handheld. Every time. Hearing his voice makes my blood pressure soar.

PhD thesis: How to mess shit up. #6- Imperial vs metric system!

A rare chance
I get to work on the G2XS QTOF and replace an aperture plate
All by myself

Got to practise how to use a megger
Then Dr Eugene came to stare as usual
He gave 100% attention at what I was working on

I deliberately ignored his presence
And spent a long time with tof side flange screws
A failed attempt at turning him away

Because it never did
His stares made me uncomfortable
And his questions were irrelevant

“How are the cables configured?”
2 from the computer
1 to the LC
1 to the MS
Another cable from LC to MS

My heart died a little
Ethernet and serial cables
They are meant for different purpose

Next up was the stepwave
He could clean it if he’s familiar
But he wanted me to show him
Ok, but he’s got to wait till I’m done

He asked Dr Harmless Freesia to show
But she had to prepare presentation
She stepped into the lab and entertained a little
Then went back to the office

Dr Eugene then went ahead
Borrowing our tools
Help! He needed help again
What’s surprising about that

The screws got rounded to my #1 horror
I stared at the screws, resigned
Stop doing it incorrectly!
How much more do you want to damage

To my #2 horror
He’s been using imperial Allen key!!!
That’s not meant for the mass spec...
All of me died inside

Dependable knight suggested I go back
To fit the aperture plate
And stop wasting time on cleaning stepwave
He will brief Dr Eugene

To my #3 horror
He cleaned the stepwave
But left out the metal cap
DN said Dr Eugene had been briefed to do it

Stop all what you’re doing
He’s banned from touching the instrument ever
I was finally done with aperture plate and megger
And spent a long time assembling the stepwave

To my #4 horror
The ion block was full of carbon
It was 6 in the evening
I really wanted to go home

Why did you do one but not the other
He’s never done it before
He’s never seen a dirty ion block
So much time was wasted

We could not pump down the instrument today
But I was glad I spent time with the tof today
He never fails to piss me
He will be banned banned banned banned banned forever